Whatchonameshawty?

Stacey Fucking Dash.

Stacey Dash is 42 years old. I'm just gonna let that marinate for a minute.


Fully marinated on? Cool. All I'll say is that she would get smashed on...repeatedly...over and over...and over.


Milf. Cougar. Whatever you wanna call it, it looks mighty damn good.


(Hat tip:YBF) Read more!

Whatchonameshawty?

I have a major crush on Lauren London. I don't know why that is exactly. Maybe cause she looks like the kind of chick that can hook up a plate of scrambled eggs, talk dirty to you, and appreciate the social complexities of Grand Theft Auto. She just seems like that chick, you know? I wanna make brownies with her. Take that how you want.


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Whatchonameshawty?

"You such a vivrant thing. Vivrant vivrant vivrant thing."

The list of things I won't do to Leila Arcieri, you could just about squeeze in between a gnat's ass cheeks. She's one of the baddest chicks in the game. I'm so in love with this chick, it truly is unhealthy. If I had the money to effectively stalk her, I would. I want to make her home fries, eggs, and bacon for breakfast. I wanna do her laundry. I wanna plait her hair. I just want to breathe the same fucking oxygen that she breathes. I take it back, this infatuation is incredibly healthy. Read more!

Whatchonameshawty?

"She's got legs. She knows how to use them." At 6' tall, I do believe Aisha Tyler does know how to use them. Not only is she cute, but she's tall. Most guys don't dig tall chicks, but I'm 6'3" and there's just something about looking a woman in the eyes. With heels, she's probably about an inch or so taller than me. No matter, cause we'd have some tall ass kids that would sign $220 million contracts in the NBA. Now, I just gotta find a way to get rid of her husband, to make this diabolical plan come to fruition. I got a few ideas I'm working on....

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Whatchonameshawty?

Kelly is that you? Once upon I time, I thought Kelly was around a "4" or a "5." I just wasn't feeling her. Compared to Beyonce, she was...eh. But now? I have to admit, she has stepped up her glam game, for sure. I don't know if it's her makeup, a new haircut, or what, but she's definitely a "7" or "8" now. Plus, she's got major "bump," which is always a plus. Good work, Kelly. We're all proud of you.

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Whatchonameshawty?

"Looking at the honey in front of you with the light eyes."

There's something about a black chick with light eyes. It's almost hypnotic. Keri Hilson is hypnotizing me. Apparently Miss Hilson is the talented sort, as she's a singer AND songwriter. Honestly, I'd never heard of her before 15 minutes ago. But she definitely trips my trigger. Good work, Mr. and Mrs. Hilson. Read more!

Yellow Fever

When a white guy sees an attractive white chick, he might say, "That chick is hot!" When a black guy sees an attractive black chick, he might say, "That is a dope ass light-skinned chick." Huh?

The HCIC and I have this running dialogue where she accuses me of not liking brown/dark skinned black people, and I accuse her of not liking light skinned black people. Sound crazy? Well, black people are more preoccupied with color than you think. I have a homegirl who will NOT date light skinned guys. I know guys who only likes brown skinned chicks. Somehow, it has something to do with slavery. Doesn't it always? I kid.

So in my efforts to bring us together, not unlike Dr. King, I will begin highlighting black women of various shades in order to show that we are all beautiful no matter how light or dark our skin may be. Not buying it? OK, I like putting up pics of really attractive women. Sue me.

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