Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Old School Wednesday - Bo Knew Diddly

Nope, no videos today. Today we're hitting you with some old school commercials. They're not necessarily classics, but they are enjoyable in their own right. It's always cool to see how commercials have evolved over the years. I don't know if this will be a regular thing, but we'll just see how it goes. Enjoy.

Jordan

I'm posting this commercial in honor of Realist. As a die hard Bulls fan, he's really going through the ringer now. The Bulls are "defeated" and Bulls fans are calling for Kobe. By the way, he hates Kobe. Now just imagine how that's gonna work out. So, this Bud's for you. Not only is it a Jordan commercial, but it's a Jordan commercial in which he totally eviscerates a non-existent Laker defense. Enjoy.




Bo Jackson

You don't need me to tell you that Bo was the man in the early 90's. Unfortunately, he was robbed of his career by the Bengals. Harbinger of things to come, no? Anyway, this was always my favorite iteration because of Gretzky's part. What's with the condescension Wayne? Don't think black people can play hockey? Guess you would've won those titles without Grant Fuhr huh? But can you imagine Bo on skates, with bad intentions in his eyes? That would have been illegal. No seriously, he would've been arrested for felonious assault at some point.




Pistol Pete & Andre


Isn't that cute? Madison Avenue really wanted us to care about men's tennis. And you know what? I actually did for a second. Everyone hoped this rivalry would take men's tennis to the stratosphere, but it just didn't. You know what would've helped? Staging a match, for real, in the middle of Times Square. That would've given Guiliani a heart attack and earned the sport some serious publicity. See, a win-win.




AI & Jada

This commercial almost single handedly ruined the NBA. This melding of hip hop and basketball makes my vomit wanna vomit. Couple of nigg-I mean thugs running around, rapping and rhyming, hipping and hopping, and scaring away all the decent corporate whitefolk. Allen Iverson is a menace. You hear me?!? A MENACE!!!!




MJ

Michael Jackson. LA Gear. Has there been a more symbiotic relationship? How could this venture possibly fail? Almost 20 years later, and I'm still trying to understand how he didn't overtake Jordan. But on the real, isn't it cool to see Mike with at least a little color in his face?




George Gervin

The best part of this commercial? Gervin's finger roll from about 10 feet. How in the Hell is that even possible? That shot was laced with influenza, for real. Now, the second best part of the commercial? That patented Tim Hardaway personality and wit that got him canned from NBA Fastbreak a couple years ago. I love Tim as a player, but as a speaker? Blechh.

3 comments:

Da Realist said...

I don't understand some people. Sampras/Agassi was CLASSIC. What more could you ask for? It was our Borg/McEnroe. The men's version of Evert/Navritalova. Dare I say it? The tennis version of Bird/Magic. How can you hate on that???

Gangsta D said...

There's no way you can compare Sampras/Agassi to Magic/Bird. I'm not talking quality of play. I'm talking about excitement and national relevance. Pete and Dre never captured that zeitgest for an extended period of time. Sorry, it just never happened.

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